The Diaries of a Teenage Princess
by Renata Swift
Summary: Princess Crystal Milo Thatch spills all in her super top-secret diaries! Discover the world through her eyes! Humor, sarcasm and a lot of exclamatory marks!
1. Entry No 1

**  
Well, hiya everyone! Welcome to my latest fanfic, filled with humour, sarcasm and typical teenage lifestyle! **

**Dedicated to: Krish – you're the ONLY one in the class who actually bothers to read my stories (neoprincessrini sticks her tongue out to the rest of her so-called friends)! **

**Atlantis and its characters are copyright Disney – but ** **Crystal**** and Talamin and other new names are MINE! **

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**The Diaries of a Teenage Princess **

**25th June 2005**

**My Room **

**Royal** **Atlantian** **Palace**

Dear Diary,

I must be in the middle of an identity crisis, because my best friend Talamin would have never EVER given me this diary (it is SOOO cute, though!)

Well, here are some details about me in case I am stuck in the middle of another ID crisis:

Name: Crystal Milo Thatch Name Meaning??? Occupation : Princess of Atlantis, Student and Daddy's Girl…not forgetting Junior Member of the Atlantian High Court Jury Age: 12 years Height: 5"1' Birthday: 11th June Zodiac Sign: Gemini Gemstone: Pearl, Moonstone Blood Group: A Hair Color: Chocolate brown with natural caramel coloured streaks, inherited from Dad Writing Hand: Right Eye Color: Hazel, also from Dad Favourite Color: Pink, Lilac, Lavender Hobbies: Singing, dancing, internet surfing Favourite Food: Ice Cream, chips, fries, chocolate…junk food! Least Favourite Food: Carrots, Lobster Bisque Favorite Subjects: English, History without the dates Least Favourite Subject: Maths and and practically everything else Special Talent: Singing, Dancing, Language Skills, Art and Craft, G.K., driving my parents crazy (" Crystal! Turn down the volume!") Favourite Music : Bratz, Hilary Duff, Lindsay Lohan, Dina Dawson, Sum 41, Kelly Clarkson…..the drill! Weaknesses: Dentists, Studies, Mom when she's angry, my Royal duties Dream: To be an Idol, to be the most popular girl EVER (which I already am) 

Oh my God. I didn't remember half the things in the list above! I AM in the middle of an identity crisis!

Oh well.

Mmmmm……I smell pancakes….I'm going for dinner! (Sorry for being so abrupt!)

**Crystal Thatch**

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	2. Enrty No 2

**Well, here is the second chapter - hope you enjoy it!**

**For the disclaimer - read chapter one!**

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26th June 2005

My Room

Royal Atlantian Palace

**********Dear Diary, **

Today was awful! My maths teacher failed me in my test! P.S. – I am NOT A FLUNKIE!

Let me tell you a little about my Maths teacher. He is obsessed with the fact that a kid like me has a higher position in society than him. So everytime I give an answer or test, he fails me. This didn't bother my parents at first, as they only thought I was kidding. But now, they are really REALLY mad. Dad is already screaming that he's going to sue my teacher (I can hear him now, and I'm 5 rooms away from him!)

Anyway, Talamin and I went shopping in the Old Bazaar today. We got some really cool jewellery, and lots of beads to make necklaces. A man actually even tried to sell us a chicken, which, according to him, laid golden eggs! Some people are NUTS!

Our school's Annual Prize Day is coming up, in which all the kids who got the top ranks in their classes, get prizes. There is also going to be a Play at the end. I am trying out for the part of the main character tomorrow. We are doing a remake of Mulan for the skit. Since I have learnt some pretty impressive karate moves, which Mulan does in the movie, and I have an angel's voice (which the WHOLE school apparently says I have…..?) so there's a good chance I might be selected. Plus, I am a pretty convincing liar/actress….

I'm going to sing the song "Reflection" and recite the paragraph in which she sits in the garden with her father for the audition.

Oops… I got to go…Dad is yelling even more….I better go and calm him down…

**Crystal Thatch**

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**Hope you enjoyed..I know it was short...I promise the next one will be long!**

**xoxoxoxox love neoprincessrini**

**P.S - Thnx for the review, **scarletdeathangel05! **I have meant for Crystal to be a little self-centered, but shee pulls through in the end...I feel sorry for your cousin, though... And I like the bottom line too!**


	3. Entry No 3

**Heya! Well - here's Crystal's Entry No. 3!**

**For the disclaimer - read Entry No. 1!**

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**27th June 2005**

**School Auditorium **

**Modern** **School** **of Knowledge **

Dear Diary-

HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

I am at school for the auditions – and I can't remember anything!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

What do I do! What do I do!

Talamin is stroking my arm – telling me to get a grip and calm down!

I AM CALM! (I think…)

Everyone is SO much better than me! They are talking and singing so smoothly! I am so IMMATURE! (No….)

I feel ….. AAAAAAAAAAAAA! NERVOUS! I don't seem to have stage fright, SO WHY….WHY AM I NERVOUS!

My turn is coming up! What do I do! I can't remember any thing! I remember my karate moves from princess/warrior training, I remember the song….BUT I FORGOT MY LINES!

EVERYONE EXPECTS ME TO BE GOOD SINCE I'M THE PRINCESS!WHY, OH WHY DOES LIFE HAVE TO BE SO **CRUEL**! WHY! OH, KINGS OF OUR PAST, WHY!

Dad is sitting right next to me, twiddling his thumbs, when he sees me sweating. "Jiminy Christmas! You don't have to be SO nervous!" he laughs.

One, Dad, it's not Christmas yet. Two, I'm already sweating!

My hands are cold and sweaty (I thought you only sweat when you're hot…) and it's MY TURN!

Wish me LUCK!

**Crystal Thatch **

P.S. – They will call me tomorrow if I get the part!

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**I simply cannot write an entry longer than this, I'm sorry to say! Well, thanks to the one who DID review! **

**P.S. - Why doesn't anyone review for Stories and Dreams and Surprise Surprise? Well those are my other stories - so be sure to READ!**

**xoxoxoxox luv neoprincessrini!**


	4. Entry No 4

**Well - here is the fourth chappie! Thanks a LOT, scarletdeathange, for reviewing my stories! (You seem to be the only one...) If you like my stories, please check out my others - "Surprise Surprise" and "Stories and Dreams" and REVIEW, REVIEW and REVIEW!**

**For the disclaimer - read chappie no. 1!**

**Here we go!**

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**28th June 2005**

**Royal Throne Room**

**Royal Atlantian Palace**

Dear Diary- 

I DID IT! I GOT THE PART OF MULAN!

One minute, I was sitting there, listening to Hilary on the computer – when the phone rings. My dad likes to get the phone first (nerd….oh well, I do love him!) so I had no chance to see who it was. And so, he picks it up – "Hello? Yes… what? Oh, OK," and he hands it to me. "For you," and he goes back to reading that dumb novel he was reading before he picked up the phone. So the convo goes like this –

"Hello? Crystal speaking…"

"Hello? We're calling from the Modern School of Knowledge….you were auditioning for the part of Mulan?"

Now my hands were into sweat mode. "Yes…."

"Well, you have got the part."

I slowly put down the receiver, gathered all my breath, and let out an earsplitting yell. Dad calmly put down his book (he is never calm…what happened!) and said, "Shout again, honey – there must be people fifty miles away who didn't hear you…"

Just then, Maatem ran into the room, spear at the ready. "What happened, _kimana_? Are you alright?" she asked in a single breath. " Milo ! Didn't you see what happened?"

"Maatem, I got the part! I did it! I'm gonna be the teen queen now!" I pranced around like a five-year-old.

"Well, you're not thirteen exactly…" My dad started, but Maatem shut him up faster than you can say Kidagakash (well – actually that is possible) with a barrelful of questions.

"Oh…_kimana_…I'm so SO proud of you! How do you feel? Let me give you an ice cream and a split banana- "

"Banana split, muffin," Dad quietly corrected Maatem.

"…and there will be lots of that chocolate sauce that you like, but I will not insect.."

"…Bug." Dad the English master.

"..Yes..yes..bug you into it. What do you say?" Maatem smiled at me.

"Um…I'm gonna have to sing as well, so no ice cream for me" – everyone knows my mom does ANYTHING to get her hands on ice cream – " but you go ahead, OK, Maatem?" I was SO overwhelmed by these questions that even Dad says I will burn the paper off this book, the way I am writing!

Well, tomorrow I have to go for play practice to school, but on school days I will have to stay back in school for two hours' worth of practice…it's gonna be SOOO COOL!

**Crystal Thatch **

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**Well - there it is! Mystery solved (I bet most of you were expecting this...it was kind of predictable!)! But don't think the story stops here... what happens in play practise? Does Crystal become popular? Is the play a success...or a failure? Find out more! Stay tuned!**

**xoxoxoxoxo luv neoprincessrini!**

**P.S. - REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! (i'm not mental, honest...)**


	5. Entry No 5

**scarletdeathangel05 - You are what pushes me to WRITE! Thnx SO SO much!**

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**29th June 2005**

**Auditorium **

**Modern** **School** **of Knowledge **

Dear Diary,

OMG. Today was the first day of play practice, and there was only one word for it.

STINKY.

Seriously! I didn't know my school had such JERKS!

OK. It went like this:

I walked into the auditorium, which was buzzing with laughter and voices from all the kids and teachers there. I walked in, and it fell silent. I smiled sheepishly, and sat down with Talamin, who had been selected for the role of the wacky granny (!).

"OK, kids, thank you for participating for the Prize Day skit," Our Headmistress started.

"As you probably know, we are doing a remake of the popular movie Mulan. I will read out the characters, and the actors portraying them.

"Fa Mulan – Crystal Thatch.."

I blushed and walked to the front of the auditorium. Everyone applauded politely, and Tala hooted.

"Fa Li…" A girl I predicted to be older than me walked next to me. Her nose was in the clouds, but I just thought she had a habit of standing like that.

"Grandma Fa…." Tala walked next to the older girl and pretended to cry while accepting an imaginary Oscar from an invisible entity.

And so the names were read out. Soon we got to learning our lines. The director of the play, a teacher from the Senior Section, handed us our scripts, and we thanked her.

We decided to practice the "Matchmaker" scene. As I got to the part where Mulan is supposed to accidentally pour tea over the Matchmaker (in this case a FAT eighth grader)

she screeched in my ear, and pushed me. I stumbled backward, falling over. Then she got up, and yelled at me. "What's the idea of screeching in my ear like that!"

"Hey,…YOU'RE the one who screeched and pushed me!" I yelled back at her.

"No," the boy playing Fa said. "You screeched. We all heard it, right, guys?" He turned around to face the rest of the cast. Everyone except Tala and another girl nodded in agreement.

"WHAT!" I looked around helplessly for the teachers, but they were nowhere to be seen. The cast walked away, as a teacher burst in and said," OK, kids, practice time's over….My, Crystal , what happened?"

When I fell over I had sprained my leg. Tala and the anonymous girl helped me up, and handed me my bag. "Thanks, guys," I whispered as they helped me down the stage.

As we walked out of school, the girl said, "Hi…My name is Mina…I saw how that girl pushed you. The others were lying."

Before I could say anything, Tala spoke up sharply, "Why did they lie?"

Mina said, "They are jealous that she is the Princess, and thought it was favouritism by which you got the part. Before you came, the teachers were explaining that they chose Crystal because she was the best and not out of favouritism."

"Well, thanks a lot, Mina…See you tomorrow!" I yelled after her cheerfully as Tala helped me limp back to the Palace.

Dad had a fit when he saw the sprain. I mended it with my crystal, but it still hurts when I walked. I also found out that some of Dad's friends are coming from the US tomorrow to visit him.

That's it for today (I hope!)

** Crystal Thatch **

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Well - there it is! thanx for reviewing Surprise Surprise scarletdeathangel05!


	6. Entry No 6

**Here it is!**

**Well - I won't be updating so much for a week since my exams are on...so enjoy what you can!**

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**30th June 2005**

**Throne Room **

**Royal Atlantean Palace **

Dear Diary ---

I've seen a lot of cool stuff, and a lot of weird stuff. Dad's friends definitely come under the "weird" category.

I was woken up early in the morning by Dad pushing me out of bed, muttering incoherently about something which sounded like, "Can't wake…will be here…first impressions…"

Then, when I went down to breakfast, Maatem said, "Breakfast today only after they come…."

THEY!

Oh yeah. Dad's friends.

So we went down to the docks, where a fancy ship was pulling into the pier. A ladder was bought out, and Dad's friends were here. I will try my best to explain their characters, and anyone who reads this (there better not be anyone) will be shocked beyond belief.

**Martha Packard: **She's old, frail physically and not mentally, and her smoking is gonna increase her death rate. She has Compulsive Phone-Talk Disorder (as I call it) and she talks to some other old bat called Margie all the time. She sleeps in the nude AND SLEEPWALKS.

**Gaton Moliere: **French geologist. A huge pervert (he FLIRTED with me in front of my parents!) and is desperate for a date. He takes baths only once a year and was raised by naked mole-rats. His pyjamas are in the colours of the French flag, and has a mole as a pet.

His NICKNAME is Mole.

**Joshua Sweet: **Weird kind of doctor. Seems to think I have some sort of deficiency because I'm so thin. Also has a weird kind of humour. Other than that, he seems OK.

**Audrey Ramierez: **Top mechanic…has a dry (I mean DRY) sense of humour. Can't seem to stand Mole (then again, neither can I). She's fun to hang around with.

**Cookie: **The cook on the original Ulysses expedition. No one seems to know his real name. His food stinks BIG-TIME! It smells worse than the toilets in my school, and trust me, you don't EVER wanna go in there!

**Vincenzo Santorini: **Demolitions expert. He's got dynamite, cherry bombs and other kinds of explosive stuff ALL around him. Funny accent. Kinda weird….REALLY weird.

**Preston** **Whitmore: **Old. REALLY old. He was great-grandpa's best buddy. He financed the expedition to Atlantis. He's….funny. A yoga freak. Collects a lot of weird stuff, like Excalibur and the Holy Grail….that IS weird……

See. SEE! They are SO SO SO weird! OMG! How DOES Dad like them!

Got to go – I smell dinner…..writing makes me hungry…..I'll give you the 411 on it later!

**Crystal Thatch **

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	7. Entry No 7

**Hiya everyone! Sorry it took so long to update, but I had exams! So this chappie is very short - sorry again!**

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**30th June 2005**

**Throne Room **

**Royal Atlantean Palace **

Dear Diary,

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

I AM SOOOO ANGRY!

YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?

…………………………………….

Today we went on the Grand Atlantis Tour, to show Dad's friends around. It was OK. What happened after that….

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Well, there was Dad, Mr. Tour Guide, pointing out all the things. He said that when he had come here, it was all native and stuff. Now, everyone has four TVs, a computer, an iPod, or an MP3 player.

Dad, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT!

Anyway, we had lunch at Niraka's, since the crew wanted a taste of ATLANTEAN food. Personally, I would have preferred McDonald's any day.

Then, when we got home, the nightmares started.

I know…just KNOW that my parents are there to embarrass me. I mean EMBARRASS.

Dad and Maatem took out the baby photos.

I'm sure you sympathize with my predicament.

Don't you

He took out the album in which I was 3 years old.

DO NOT READ ON IF YOU ARE A DELICATE, FRAIL PERSON (who the heck is reading this anyway!).

Anyway, there was a lot of cooing and "oohs" and "aahs" coming from the Royal Library, and then – I just knew – something was terribly wrong.

I walked into the library, and all eyes were on me. "What!" I yelled. Suddenly I saw the albums and I understood.

I was almost going to drop dead with embarrassment, and I was already as red as a tomato, but I gave a feeble giggle, and ran out of the room.

I am in the bathroom writing this. This will be very short, as I feel like vomiting right now. Also I might die, and if I do, my stuff will not be distributed, but put in the museum.

YOU MUST OBEY!

OOOkkkaaaayyyy…..what was that!

Well, I am preparing to die --- see you in my next life!

**Crystal Thatch **

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**I WILL try my best to update soon...**


	8. Entry No 8

**Hiya everyone!** \**Well I know it took long to update, 'cause my exams were on and my mom allows only half an hour on the comp every day - but here is the next chappie!**

**P.S. - KikyoGoddess - I seriously think you should visist a psychiatrist. You seem to have some superiority and insult syndrome. If you hate my stories so much, why bother reeading them? And why have you put me in your _Favourite Authors_ list if you hate me so much?If you must know, I am an award-winning writer who's story appeared in the newspapers. Maybe that did'nt happen to you - which is why you hate me so much...And I don't mean to be rude..(Get it? Mean? Rude? Hahahaha!I'm SOOO funny!)**

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**1st July 2005**

**Auditorium **

**Modern** **School** **of Knowledge **

Dear Diary,

Well, another day of being harassed by your fellow actors.

Today, we were practising the song sequence of "Be A Man" when all of the dancers pushed me down, then made it look like my fault.

The teachers are nowhere when I want to complain, and Tala is going nuts and Mina has a JOB trying to calm her down.

I really wanna drop dead with embarrassment, therefore I've compiled my Last Will and Testament.

**Crystal Thatch's Last Will and Testament **

To my father – I leave all my technological gizmos (like computer and MP3 player);

To my mother – all my accessories;

To Talamin – all my CDs and radio;

To Audrey – umm…nothing!

To Mole – EWW!

To Dr. Sweet – nothing….

To Mrs. Packard – nothing (cuz' I hate you)

AAAAAAAAA! Now THIS is driving me nuts!

AAA….Brain freeze…I thing I'll go get some juice.

BTW – nothing interesting occurred today.

**Crystal Thatch **

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	9. NOTICE!

**Ok, guys - here's the story. I am now allowed only one hr. on the comp, and our teachers are loading us with work. What's more, I have a lot of things to do right now (social obligations), so I'm gonna take a little hiatus.**

**BUT HEY! Christmas hols are around the corner, and whenever I get time, I WILL update - that's my promise. I know you hate it when your fave stories are not updated. So, keep smilin' and watch this space!**

**- neoprincessrini**


	10. Entry No 9

**Heya - I'm back! Aftyer a week of exams, here is the brand-new chappie!**

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**2nd July 2005**

**Auditorium **

**Modern** **School** **of Knowledge **

Dear Diary,

Well – let's just say I'm really smart.

I have devised the perfect plan for getting back at those losers in the play!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I'M SOOOOO EVIL!

MUHAHAHAHAha…ha…ha…

Oookaaay…..

Well – here goes.

In the matchmaker scene (which we keep practicing since that fatso will never get her lines right) we are using real tea. So…instead of tea, Tala and I will take out the tea, and put in a MUD MIXTURE! IS THAT EVIL, OR IS THAT EVIL!

MUAHAHAHA!

Mina's not too happy about that, though. Who cares, anyway? I'll be getting revenge, and those flatheads will get their just desserts!

Ok… I have to go…we just got a break and I need to get that mud!

**Crystal Thatch **

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**Hope ya enjoyed it! (Let's see what happens...)**


	11. Entry No 10

**Well, here is the next chappie! Thanks a lot to everyone who reviewed! Sorry about what happened, AquarianWolf - You know!**

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**3rd July 2004**

**Detention Room **

**Modern** **School** **of Knowledge **

Dear Diary,

Judging from where I am right now, you can tell I got into trouble over that mud mix thing.

Well, what happened was, when that Matchmaker dudette drank the mud mix, she started choking. Don't worry, she was only pretending to, since a friend of hers followed me and Tala when we went to get the mud. She informed the Fatso (as we call her) and so, they replaced the mud mix with tea again.

As she was "choking", Tala started laughing, so we were immediately under suspicion.

That's when the girl who followed us stood up and dramatically pointed at us, as though she were a witch cursing us.

"They did it, Mrs Anina! I saw them go down and take some mud! They emptied the tea, and put in a mud mix! Luckily, I saw it and informed Nadine!" (So, Fatso's real name is Nadine, is it? Hmm…)

So, the teachers asked us to explain. When I gave them my reason, they just…..laughed.

Of all the rude things to do!

…………

So here I sit in detention. I am serving it today (not yesterday) because there was no time yesterday. The food they give us looks like dung, the coffee the teachers drink looks like my now infamous mud mix, and smells like it too. The detention room (which I am in for the very first time) smells like someone puked all over the walls. I swear, when I become Queen, I'm gonna start a petition to get this place cleaned up.

Uh-oh – the teacher is looking this way…..got to go!

**Crystal Thatch **

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**A princess in detention - how CAN things get wackier!**


	12. Entry No 11

**Hey! Sorry I took so long in updating - my cousin came to stay, and he was determined to sit on the computer all his stay. Then my uncle gave me his cold, so here I sit, skin peeling from my face, the taste of the awful antibiotics in my mouth, nose dripping,sniffing and snorting while my cat looks at me from the top of the scanner. But hey! I have updated.**

**PS -Who saw Chronicles of Narnia? That movie ROCKED! It was better than Harry Potter 4!**

**Well, here goes!**

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**4th July 2004**

**My Room **

**Royal Atlantean Palace **

Dear Diary,

Boy, I sure got into trouble over that detention thing. Dad blew his TOP! Luckily Audrey saved me from his wrath, and actually congratulated me on such a cool plan (mud mix thing)!

Now the whole SCHOOL is on my side and hate everyone else in the Mulan crew (except Mina & Tala)! Today morning two fifth graders came to me and – get this – ASKED FOR MY AUTOGRAPH!

OMG. I'm self-actualized! I'm an idol! Take that, Simon!

Anyways, the play is getting better and better. My band, which is called Lunar Eclipse, has been asked to play the intro music in the play, like when the guests are arriving. No rock/punk, though (band speciality – it drives my parents CRAAZZEE!) – just slow soothing music.

I don't know where Maatem and Dad are, currently – probably in the garden doing – well, something – so I'm gonna stuff my face with that huge Aero bar I got.

My life is SO boring

Later!

**Crystal Thatch**

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**The "Simon" thing is from American Idol!**


	13. NOTICE IMPORTANT!

Hey all!

Well, I'm not dead. Hahahaha.

Here's the problem. My annual exams, are coming up - the most imp. exams in school. You pass these, you go to the next grade. We have approx. 16 chapters in each subject, 21 in Hindi (Surprise! I'm not American - I'm an Indian who lives in the United Arab Emirates.). Plus the Ministry of Education here has given us COMPOSITIONS in Arabic at the last minute (would you like writing a paragraph in a languagae that you aren't familiar with?). Bottom line is, I'm too busy studying to write.

Also, my grandparents are coming from Mumbai in March, and staying for two months.And if they catch me writing, boy, am I dead. My grandma hates me watching All That, The Simpsons, The Amanda Show, Tru Calling, Hollywood Squares or Lizzie McGuire. AND Spongebob Squarepants (who can hate SPONGEBOB!). She even hates me wearing jeans & shirts. She thinks it's indecent. But she's not mean. Really.

And then in April, my cousin's wedding. I will have to bunk a week of school. Booked there as well.

I also think no one is reading what I write. If you are, please send me a message, and I will think about bunking the exams (shifty eyes).

So - I'm sorry. When I get time to write, I will.

Love and God bless - neoprincessrini


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